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Life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.

Life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.

I sometimes think that happiness is a personal responsibility. But what happens, then, if you can’t figure out what makes you happy?
They are fleeting moments cushioned between the mundane and obscene. If I had to describe happiness regarding the big picture, abdicating all of the material pleasures life can offer, it’s merely to be understood. For me, art, and relationships--romantic or not--tend to be the main geyser for such a feeling. When I’m understood, my existence is validated. When your existence is validated, it temporarily quells the sometimes dormant, sometimes active yearning to know why in the fuck we are here.
I think about my existence so far… I am navigating the path of the American dream. Subscribing to this path, I feel, sometimes, is an addiction to the illusion of stability, when life really comes down to chance. Or does it? I feel sickened by how much of my knowledge is theoretical. How can I understand anything if I haven’t experienced it? What is the point of my knowledge if I can’t put it to use? Our culture’s teleology feels so unnatural.
Now that I’ve entered the realm of vague generalizations, let me take it a step further. (Further in theory, farther in action…) Liberty: freedom from control.
Comcast, health insurance, 401 K, car tabs, credit scores, social security, taxes—these things make me feel out of control.
But this is when one says, “Oh, but you have a choice!”
I do? That’s like saying liberty can only be embraced in the margins of society—i.e. living off the grid, throwing the bird to the system. The founding fathers of our country fought to get away from that. (Yes, yes, by raping and pillaging an already populated land…) I don’t want to be in the margins of society; I want to be understood. I want to be represented by my government and fellow countrymen. WTF?!
I feel trapped by my addiction to the American dream.
I want both lives.
I want it all.

Comments

  1. TimAugust 30, 2012 at 11:54 AM

    I hear the wisdom.
    How do we turn it into practice?
    Can a blog change the world ?
    Can a blog change you ?
    Is convenience our enemy ?
    Where did I get this belly button lint ?

    ReplyDelete
  2. Gomie aka Connie DeWitt ViensSeptember 1, 2012 at 8:24 PM

    All you're doing Little Darling' is growing up - and you're doing one heck of a good job! Your Gomie loves you plenty just the way you are!!!

    ReplyDelete

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